6.1.07

the curious incident of the fuse in the night time

one thing about having the computer up and running again, complete with a working Internet connection is that, i cant seem to do anything else but sit in front of the screen immersed in another world accessible only through links, htmls and scripts. for hours, no less. its like just that easily, i cant seem to sit down quietly with a book without feeling the itch in my fingers to switch the computer on and log on to this other world. or be content with the content from the black box. or be doing simple things that require no interaction whatsoever with the online community. just like that, my self- reliance have vanished.

so i dont know whether to feel disappointed with myself.
and why im suddenly feeling this way? you know how sometimes, a tiny thing can happen and yet, the effect it has on you is so humongous that it can just snap you out of your stance and precisely why the effect is so great is because its such a tiny thing by itself. happening in a just a millisecond kind of thing.

i was still surfing through the wee hours of the morning last night and throwing quick glances at the wall clock, telling myself that its ok, i can still continue buffering episode after episode of this Korean drama i was watching. i thought the season of late nights entertaining K- ds is over since i returned Cloud her set of My Girl, but no. because of course like i said, i've relied on the Net to fill up my time and so, couldnt resist logging on to cruncyroll.com in search of K- Ds to watch. while the whole house was peacefully sleeping. except Sis who kept on tossing and turning because i guess the room light was still on, and with each toss and turn, i held my breath hoping that she wont wake up because for sure she'd reprimand. i mean, i have been sleeping late for as far back as i can remember, hence the darkening circles under my eyes, like ew i know. but she didnt wake up. so i was lucky.

not quite.
because just as i was about to buffer yet another episode, everything went blank.
and black. like pitch black, i couldnt even see my own hands. and there was this silence in my ears because nothing was running. just like how if you've been listening to the fan whirring and suddenly you switch the fan off, the silence is quite pregnant. so it penetrated into my head such that i was consumed by this panic. and yet i was stoned there on the chair, like i didnt want to acknowledge the sick joke that was playing on me.

then my Sis woke up. with a gasp. and she's a light- sleeper, i should have known, because the room was suddenly stuffy. and the thickness of the dark was really stifling. i know it sounds absurd but its funny how i felt like i couldnt breathe right. as though the dark has suddenly formed into this being that sucks out all the oxygen in the air. and i dont know why but im reminded now of the scene in Silence of the Lambs where Jodie Foster was suddenly thrown into pitch darknesss and she became panicky and was practically gasping for air.

so enough of the descriptions.
it was a fuse. at 3 in the morning. an overloaded circuit so current had to be interrupted.
hence the black out. hence the commotion and having to wake Dad up to get electricity flowing again so we can all have a good night sleep.

in their groggy state, they didnt realise it was my doing. Mom even asked to check if the other houses are having a black out too. then of course Sis realised. remembering how i frantically switched off the computer plugs, groping in the darkness, (i thought just to be safe before something explode) and seeing how the computer table is still messy (being me) and how the bed is still unslept in.

actually now that i think abt it, pretty hilarious. like so drama like tt.
but i cant deny that i was seriously freaked out, and it was like, some knock of sense.
i should have just turned in early considering i was really tired out actually, after staying on in school for four more hours to do some filming. or rather, to waiting around for the talents to get ready. so tsk me.

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the curious incident of the dog in the night- time by mark haddon is some read :)
thanks ah.

and i guess being called the "Gwen Stefanie" of the class should be something good? she said it is but i didnt even know i wear weird clothes. oh wells ~ i like Gwen anyway.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

very good writing man. maybe its time to get you off your addiction! ;)

-nell

Me[ssy] said...

hey there =)

here i am replying your tag! hehe. but we're supposed to be poles apart so why should i even bother *rolls eye.

anws,
normal only la my writing. cheh, modest huh. lol. but really what. yours is better la. but thanks anw! hee =)

see ya tmr ~